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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30087975">Warrior, Protector, Queen: The Life of a Regent</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ishipzalldathings/pseuds/ishipzalldathings'>ishipzalldathings</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Xena: Warrior Princess</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Death, Depression, F/F, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Multi, War</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 21:08:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>17,743</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30087975</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ishipzalldathings/pseuds/ishipzalldathings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Follow a young Ephiny as she walks the path of an amazon warrior under the rule of her queen. This is the life and death of the queen regent and her inevitable rebirth. Note: Please note this project has been my baby for over ten years. I've done what I can to perfect it so please do not steal any non-canon parts for your own.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Chilapa/Eponin, Ephiny/Solari, Gabrielle/Xena, ephiny/velasca</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. What It Means To Say Goodbye</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>NOTE: THIS STORY IS MY OWN, EXCEPT WHEN IT COMES TO CANON. PLEASE DO NOT STEAL THIS STORY, IT'S BEEN IN THE WORKS FOR A VERY LONG TIME. A LOT OF YEARS HAVE GONE INTO THIS CHARACTER.</p><p>TW: Death, war, and as usual the feels.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong> What It Means To Say Goodbye </strong>
  </span>
</p><p>Ephiny grew up under the rule of Queen Lucina and her daughters, Melosa and Terreis. Queen Lucina was a wise queen, strong, and honorable. It was an honor to be raised under such a queen as she. Times were hard, and the war was coming. Lucina was preparing her girls for an easy fight; it would be no contest who would come out on top.</p><p>The village of men was used for procreation, and they grew unhappy and decided to do something about it. During the season, amazons would go and use them for breeding purposes. So they could bring new life into the tribes, and for many years the men did not fight back. When beautiful women came to you and demanded sex, you didn't dare say no. In the end, the men lost the battle and were back under the boot of the queen.</p><p>Men were not the only enemy; they also had centaurs. The men decided to join forces with them; this led to a decade-long battle. The fighting finally came to a halt when Queen Lucina was killed. Tyldus called off his brothers, showing mercy and allowing the young princesses time to mourn. He did not fear the girls; he imagined war would be the last thing on their minds. Melosa was only sixteen years old, only recently joining the ranks of a warrior a year before. She was very new and still training under her mother's warriors. His concerns were on a pair of warlords, they were after the stone, and his brothers were needed elsewhere.</p><hr/><p>Melosa had a hard time letting her mother go, the mourning period had passed, and everything came to a halt. She stayed with her mother inside the burial tent, ordering everyone but Terreis away when they neared. "My Queen," Melosa stiffened when she heard the voice of her mother's most trusted warrior, Fara.</p><p>"No," A hand on her shoulder, her grip tightened on the altar.</p><p>"It is time," Fara was a second mother to Melosa; she had been a considerable part of her growth. Her mother cared deeply for Fara; they were as close as two could be. It didn't take long for Melosa to understand their dynamic; Fara was her mother as much as Lucina was. "She needs to soar." Melosa refused to cry; she fought back the tears.</p><p>"I can't," Melosa could see two pairs of eyes peering into the doorway, clearly Terreis and Ephiny. She turned her back, not wanting them to see her so weak.</p><p>"This is not goodbye; we will see her again. It is time for you to be a leader, to set an example for your tribe."</p><p>"You're right. I'm sorry for being so weak," Fara was quick to defend and shook her head, leading Melosa to a chair to sit.</p><p>"Listen, emotions are not weakness, so long as you don't let them rule you. You are still so young and have much to learn, and your sisters will guide you. I will guide you," Melosa wrapped her arms around Fara and squeezed her tight, "I miss her every day, but I know I will see her again. She'll be waiting for us in eternity." Fara wrapped her arms around Melosa, letting her linger. Lucina's daughters were a part of her in so many ways; she felt like a mother to them.</p><p>"I know she loved you very much." Melosa finally spoke but dare not look up at Fara, "It was never said around us, but I know." Fara shushed her, "No, you did love her?"</p><p>"With all my heart. My duty was to her, you, and Terreis." Fara smiled as Terreis wrapped her arms around a strong leg. "I serve the mask." Ephiny shuffled in and leaned against her mother, all of them staying close for just a little longer.</p><p>"I let my emotions rule me," Melosa pulled away from the embrace, and with a nod, she stood tall. "I have waited long enough." She walked over to her mother and placed a hand on her chest. "Forgive me for being so selfish and keeping you here. I will set you free and take my place as queen, and once I have the mask, I will get revenge on those who betrayed us." Melosa wanted justice, and she wasn't the only one.</p><p>"Melosa," Terreis had no problem arguing with her sister, "war is what killed mother; why start another?" The two went back and forth before Fara called in some of the sisters.</p><p>"Enough of this; it's time for you both to get ready. Ephiny, go and get yourself washed up." Ephiny wanted to stay, but she would not argue with her mother, not right now.</p><p>"Ephiny, why don't you come to the spring with us? You can share a special bath with salts?" Ephiny nodded happily before she and Terreis were racing to the spring.</p><p>"May I stay a moment?" Fara did not look at Melosa and let her gaze linger on Lucina. She needed some time, and Melosa wanted to give her that. She had kept her mother away from everyone, refusing to leave her side.</p><p>"I want you to have your time with her. Come find us when it's time," Melosa gave Fara a hug and squeezed, "all the time you need." She whispered before rushing off to the baths.</p><p>When everyone was gone, she moved over to Lucina and reached her hand out. The usual stable hand was quivering, emotions welling up inside. She stroked her queen's hair and tried to catch her breath, "My Queen," She had no need to hide her feelings when it was just them. Lucina allowed her to be open and honest, speak her mind and give concerns. She cried in front of her queen many times, and Lucina just held her, but she could not let go now. Once she started, she would not stop, "I try and find comfort in my own words, but I'm just as lost without you. I feel as though Atropos could cut my thread any moment; I can't be without you." Fara felt warmth as if someone touched her shoulder, but no one was there when she turned. "My love?" Fara choked back a sob, resting her head against her queen's hand. "I can not show weakness; I'm meant to be strong, a protector." She placed a kiss upon her hand and squeezed her eyes shut, "and I will protect them with my dying breath. They are not born of me, but they are mine. Even before you took me as yours, I loved them. I failed you, but I will not fail them, less I throw myself on my own sword."</p><hr/><p>The pyres were lit, and the sisters said goodbye, mourning but celebrating the life these warriors led. As amazons, the loss was not new, and many warriors did not live a prolonged life. Children lost mothers, aunts, and sisters at young ages, but they would never be alone. Someone from the tribe would take them in, protect them, clothe them, and teach them the ways of the amazon. The patron mothers, these women, took care of the community, taught the children, and watched them when their mothers went to war. Ephiny knew she wanted to be a warrior; she had no interest in raising babies. It didn't mean she wouldn't one day, but that wasn't something she strived for. Like her mother, she chose to be a warrior first and then took on motherhood.</p><p>Ephiny was only eight when the queen died, but she knew what it meant to say goodbye even at that age. For one so young, she was very observant; she could see the faces of her sisters. The sorrow, the way they remembered, and even though they mourned, they had anger. Yelling, howling, a rage that spilled from the depths of their souls. She could see Queen Melosa and Princess Terreis on the dais; next to them was her mother. "Stand with me," she made her way up and took her place by Terreis and her mother. She looked to see Melosa with her arm wrapped around her sister's shoulders, holding her as she cried. Melosa held back her tears and stared into the flames of her mother's pyre. When she looked up at her mother, she could see the usual stern expression was softer. Her eyes were swollen, red as if she'd been crying.</p><p>"Mama, are you okay?" Fara placed an arm around her and lifted her up slightly to place a kiss on her head.</p><p>"I'm very sad, but I will be okay." Her mother always spoke the truth to her; she never lied, even if it was a hard conversation. "Are you okay, Chariot?"</p><p>"I will be," She repeated and gave her a smile.</p><p>"Good," Ephiny straightened up, matched her mother as they stood proudly on the dais. She watched the warriors dance for Queen Lucina, mourning her, praising her life, as she soared. Ephiny wasn't a child who cried over small things. This wasn't a tiny thing, and she found her cheeks wet; she rubbed at her face as the tears fell. "We'll see them all again, Chariot. One day we will pass through the gates and see those who have gone before."</p><p>"Like Yaya?" Ephiny's grandmother had passed before she was born, but her mother talked fondly of her.</p><p>"Yes, like Yaya." Fara smiled.</p><p>"Mama, what if I can't pass through the gate? What if I get stuck in the land of the dead? What if I don't become a true warrior?"</p><p>"Chariot, you are destined for great things." Ephiny did not understand, but she guessed that every mother thought that about their child. "Go on, give comfort." Fara knew that Ephiny wanted to talk to Melosa and Terreis. She took a breath and nodded before making her way forward.</p><p>"My Queen," She took a knee just like her mother taught her. Terreis seemed confused, but Melosa smiled and looked down at her. "I know I'm not a warrior, but I practice every day. I will be a great warrior just like my mother and help defeat our enemies and make them pay. I don't have a sword now, but it's yours- right, mom?" Ephiny turned to see Fara's smile and nod. "I will be a great protector," Ephiny looked to see Melosa and Terreis smiling, which made Ephiny's heart skip. Melosa reached out and took Ephiny's hand, and pulled her into a hug.</p><p>"Ephiny, you show strength and compassion. Your mother continues to teach us all, so I don't doubt you will learn from the very best. Mother thought very highly of you, as do I. You are as close to my true sister as Terreis; you've been a part of our life since you were born. I know you will be a great warrior because your heart is for this nation." Ephiny knew at that moment, she would dedicate her life to being the best warrior she could be. She would be just like her mother and protect the queen and princess from danger. She would protect this tribe by protecting those she cared about; her training would intensify after today.</p><p>At this point, Ephiny started to take her training more seriously. Math, Science, and history were not her best subjects, but she was trying harder these days. The art of war is where she excelled and passed most of her sisters right by. She would stand on the edge of the field and mimic the warriors, and they took notice.</p><p>"Your daughter will be a handful, Fara." Jessah sighed and gave her a playful shove.</p><p>"Tell me about it," Fara paused for a second before turning her head to Jessah, "Take care of her for me when the time comes?"</p><p>"It would be an honor but do not speak of such things."</p><p>"I'm practical; you know the war will come and with war-"</p><p>"Yes, it brings unforeseen circumstances."</p><p>"Mom!" Fara turned to see Ephiny coming right for her, "train with me!" Ephiny had been training harder than any underage warrior; the Patrons were impressed with her ability to learn. Yet, they cursed her inability to sit still, "mom!"</p><p>"You are supposed to be in your studies; Patron Hitta will not be pleased by your sudden disappearance." Ephiny's shoulders slumped, "and I have to see Queen Melosa, but we can practice later, now off you go and take Velasca with you." Velasca and Ephiny were the same age, they grew up together, and both were strong warriors in training. When Velasca's mother was killed, Melosa took her in and raised her.</p><p>"Not the boss of me," Velasca called out.</p><p>"Velasca," The sound of Melosa's voice rang out, the sisters fell in line to show respect. "Come down here," The young girl grumbled and flipped out of the tree, landing and crossing her arms defiantly. "You two have been told before lessons first. I expect you both back in the care of the patrons, where you will learn the basic techniques before the advanced skills."</p><p>"Yes, Queen Melosa."</p><p>"Fine." Velasca was the only one who could get away with that kind of disrespect. Melosa showed her disapproval by putting the young girl in a headlock. "Ow!"</p><p>"Move, or you'll be changing diapers in the nursery instead of your sword lessons." Melosa was smiling when she set Velasca free, and they both ran off.</p><hr/><p>Ephiny was thirteen seasons when war reared its head again. Tyldus and Melosa could not agree on anything. According to Melosa, Tyldus was starting to encroach on amazon lands, which was against the treaty they set up a year ago. The centaurs had an advantage over the amazons, an older leader with more experience. Tyldus had been in many wars; Melosa had only seen battles at this point.</p><p>"Ephiny, go with the other children."</p><p>"I can fight them. Just give me a chance!"</p><p>"No, I must protect Melosa and Terreis. I can not do that if I'm worried about you. You are not old enough to fight, now do as I say."</p><p>"But mom-"</p><p>"You will have many more opportunities to be brave; today is not one of them. I need you to go and help protect the children. Melosa has already sent Velasca," Fara placed her hand on Ephiny's chin and gave her a kiss.</p><p>"Only cowards run and hide. I'm not a coward."</p><p>"You are thirteen seasons, not of age to go off into a warzone. I know you can handle yourself, but it is the law, and I uphold those laws. You are not ready to face a centaur," Ephiny's eyes narrowed, but Fara did not flinch.</p><p>"I am!"</p><p>"You will go to the caves and stay there. If I catch you on the battlefield, you will never see a war until I soar." Ephiny screamed out in frustration and headed for the door. "Where are you going?" Fara called after her.</p><p>"To the stupid cave's!" She headed outside and helped round up the amazon children, "let's go, stay close." She herded them along and sighed when they finally got to safety. Velasca was already there, twirling her dagger between her fingers and waiting.</p><p>"This is stupid; we should be out there," Velasca growled.</p><p>"We are just as good as anyone else. It's not fair we have to be stuck here with babies." Ephiny helped Velasca up off the ground and sighed. Ephiny and Velasca were restless, but they were kept on close watch by the patrons. They did not miss a thing, "Just stretching my legs!" Ephiny sighed exuberantly.</p><p>"You can stretch your legs in the back of the caves, young warrior. Your mother was very clear you were to stay here, now obey her wishes." Ephiny said nothing, and Patron Hitta sighed, "Ephiny," The older amazon walked over and placed a caring hand on her chin. "I know you are powerful and wise, but these beasts have been fighting much longer. They are fast, and you have not yet been taught how to take them down. Your day will come; you and Velasca will have your chance. Now, please do my old body a favor and keep me from worrying about you both."</p><p>"Yes, Hitta," they said in unison.</p><p>"Thank you."</p><hr/><p>The battle lasted a week before both sides pulled back. Many lives were lost, and Melosa finally saw what she was warned about, how war should always be a last resort. Peace talks began, and within another week, the children were brought back to the village. The younger children were taken around and brought to the schoolhouse. They were being sheltered from the dozens of warriors' bodies laid out for burning. They would be getting a funeral pyre within a day once they were prepared.</p><p>Ephiny looked around for her mother but couldn't find her. She was probably helping wounded warriors off the field, "Solari, have you seen my mother?" Solari was a couple of years older, a great sparring partner, and very pretty.</p><p>"I'm sorry, Eph, I don't know where she is." She clasped hand with Ephiny and smiled, "I'm sure she is fine. Hey, a bunch of us are meeting for food soon. Come by the tent, and we'll fill you in on everything." Ephiny agreed to meet up later and headed off. More warriors were brought in, but none were her mother. She was starting to get concerned.</p><p>"Ephiny," She turned to see Terreis coming towards her, a somber look on her face. The smile she had was now gone, "Come with me," She was about to object, but she followed after Terreis; they were heading towards the burial tent.</p><p>"I should go find my mom," Ephiny went to turn, but Terreis caught her arm and motioned inside. "No," The looks on the warrior's faces told her everything, "no," her voice small as she made her way inside and spotted her mother on the ceremonial altar.</p><p>"She is not long for this world; I'm sorry, Ephiny-" Ephiny quickly moved to her mother's side.</p><p>"Mama," She took her hand and squeezed, "You can't leave me. I'm not strong enough yet, remember? You have to teach me; you have to see me become a warrior." Tears fell down her face as she reached out to stroke her mother's cheek. "Mama?"</p><p>"Chariot," Fara's breaths were shallow, forced. "don't lose your fire or love. You were born for great things. You are a warrior," She watched her mother smile, "my girls," Melosa and Terreis came close, "Be strong, be brave, be fair. She calls me," Fara took her last breath, clutched onto her daughter's hand. The healer checked her over and officially called her death.</p><p>Silence...</p><p>"I always considered your mother my own; she took care of Terreis and me. She will be given a royal funeral in honor of her devotion to my family." Ephiny felt proud that her mother would be given such an honor. She accepted the comfort from both sisters. "Stand with us, as you once did when our mother passed. The nation mourns the loss of our sister, Fara." Ephiny spent the proper mourning period in isolation, refusing to see anyone but Melosa and Terreis. In the end, she forced herself to allow the ceremony. She could not be weak; she could not be selfish and hold her mother here.</p><p>The sounds of drum beats broke her out of her trace. That is what it felt like; it felt like a terrible nightmare. She joined Melosa and Terreis on the dais, staring at her mother's pyre. She tapped the archer on the shoulder, "May I?" She wanted to be the one to send her off. The warrior looked to Melosa, and the Queen nodded her approval. Taking the bow, she held it with a steady hand and waited for the signal before releasing the arrow. She stood stone-faced and watched as her sisters danced around the fires. Her mother was gone...</p><p>Ephiny had done her best to keep love in her heart, but she was angry. She spiraled downward quickly; her mother's death was too much for her. Each amazon that died after only fueled the hatred she had for centaurs. She finally understood the anger inside of Velasca; she became just as angry and bitter as her friend. She wanted justice for her mother's death, she wanted every centaur to pay with blood, but war never came. A treaty was signed, and the war was over within a month, all hope of revenge shattered.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. BECOMING A WARRIOR & LETTING GO</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Warnings: Abusive relationship, sexual themes (No sex but kissing between teens), and those feels.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ephiny wasn't the same after her mother died, and her friends could see her light diminish. She still focused hard on her training, but everything else seemed less important. She and Velasca would go to the forest and stay there for hours, beating on sacks of hay in fury and rage. They would often get scolded by the sentry on duty, "I've had it up to here with you two. You should be in your studies with the patrons. It is not safe for you to be out here alone without supervision. It's time we bring this to the queen," The look on Ephiny's face had Dilma only pause a moment. "I'm sorry, but if you don't listen to us, you will listen to her." Ephiny was always afraid to get in trouble with Queen Melosa. However, Velasca did not fear the wrath of her queen. She just crossed her arms in defiance on the way to the queen's hut. They both got an earful about going into the forest alone.</p>
<p>"Your fifteenth season is almost here. Soon you'll be able to join the other warriors and become part of a small sentry duty with experienced sisters. You must remain safe until you are old enough to fend for yourselves. I'm not saying you are weak or unable to fight, but you are still young. You are not ready to go it alone, even together. The enemy is out there, and I don't want to see you hurt. Numbers that is key this day in age." Melosa's face softened, and she cupped both their cheeks, "Every sister understands what you both are feeling. Ephiny, you saw my sorrow first hand. Loss comes when you least expect it and when I lost my mother, I let my rage take over. I destroyed that village, and I regret it to this day. I need you both to work through the pain in your heart. Can you do that for me?" They both nodded, "Good, now. If this comes to my attention once more, I will have no choice but to punish you. I rather not, but I will if it keeps you safe, understood?"</p>
<p>"Yes, Queen Melosa," They said in unison.</p>
<p>"Good, off to the patrons and finish your studies."</p>
<p>"We have finished our studies. They will just make us look after the kids, and I rather not." Velasca made a disgusted face, and her arms were crossed once more. In one swift motion, Melosa came up and put her in a headlock. "Ahh!"</p>
<p>"You were a kid once too, and I remember how much trouble you were and still are. These kids are a piece of plethora pie, now, go."</p>
<p>They tried to find a loophole by taking more experienced warriors with them, but no one would take them. Queen Melosa had already made it clear, no one was allowed outside the camp before turning of age. It was too dangerous, and if a child were to stumble upon a centaur or man, they could not fend for themselves if attacked. Melosa did not think they would attack children, but older girls looking of age might be prime targets. When they asked Terreis as a last resort, she seemed rather amused.</p>
<p>"You know I would do anything for the both of you, but I can't. Our Queen has already expressed that I am not to escort you into the forest. I'm sorry, you two are so close. The leaves will turn before you know it. Patience," She pressed a kiss to both their temples before walking off.</p>
<p>"Let's go." Velasca took Ephiny's hand and pulled her along.</p>
<p>"Where?"</p>
<p>"Home." She was surprised that Velasca was giving up so quickly, she expected her friend to rebel, but she just gave up.</p>
<p>"I have an idea," Ephiny suggested turning their home into a mini-training ground. "we can just build everything we need."</p>
<p>"And this is why we are best friends. If I believed in love, I'd kiss you."</p>
<p>"You don't have to be in love to kiss." A smile crept up on Velasca's face, her brow raised in amusement. "What?"</p>
<p>"You want to kiss me?" Ephiny dropped down from the scaffolding of their home. , Standing in front of Velasca and tilted her head to the side.</p>
<p>"Thought about it, but I don't think you could handle me."</p>
<p>"I like a challenge." This was not planned, but they agreed that whatever this was would not get in the way of their training. No one thought it was strange the two ended up together, both being so close at all times. And they were now around the age when most young warriors experimented. But, neither of them flaunted their relationship like most young teens. They would share a kiss rarely in public, but they were always seen shoulder to shoulder- nothing else changed.</p>
<p>"We're warriors first," Ephiny told an amused Terreis; she was trying to wrap her head around it.</p>
<p>"But you're dating?"</p>
<p>"Yes, however, I don't see how this is any of your business." Velasca sat, Ephiny's fingers laced between her own.</p>
<p>"I just never seen a relationship of convenience before. I mean- are you two exclusive, or is this just-" Ephiny rolled her eyes at Terreis; the pair had already talked about this.</p>
<p>"If you must know, as of right now, we are exclusive. This is the extent of what we will share with the public. We do not wish to parade around for the known world to see." Velasca lifted Ephiny's hand to her lips and smiled, kissing her fingertips. "What we do in private is none of anyone's business."</p>
<p>"I'm not asking for details. That is a boundary I dare not cross. I just want to make sure you both are making the right choices. You're learning together, and if you have questions, you should talk with the patrons. As scary as that would be, they would be the best to talk to." Terreis gave them both a sweet smile.</p>
<p>"We have no questions. We're very capable but thank you, Terreis." Ephiny sighed.</p>
<p>"I noticed when the patrons started talking about sex, you two would runoff. You skipped a lot of those talks; you missed a few crucial lessons. It's not all about sex, and I know it's hard to listen to, but it is important. It's not just physical, but safety and care."</p>
<p>"We do not want to talk with the patrons about our sex life, thanks." Ephiny shook her head, "we're fine, and we're safe; I mean, what else is there?" Terreis just smiled at Ephiny before nodding her head, knowing they would not budge.</p>
<hr/>
<p>When word did get around about their relationship, Melosa knew it was time to re-have the talk. She had tried once before, but neither of them would sit and listen to her very long. She got all the basics of womanhood in. A woman's cycle, Babies, the rituals of bedding a man, but they were done at the end of that. Now that they were older and a lot more obedient, a term her mother used. She decided to try again, but this time with a little help.</p>
<p>Velasca was absolutely horrified; Queen Melosa stood next to Patron Hitta, an amused smile on her face. "No, we don't need lessons on sex; it's pointless."</p>
<p>"Velasca," Patron Hitta took a step forward, facing both of the young girls with a smile. "You two should be able to talk about it before doing it. You both are coming of age, and it's normal. This is not about shaming you or parading you around the village; believe me, no one wants that."</p>
<p>"We do not feel comfortable." Velasca had been doing most of the talking; Ephiny stood in silence, wild-eyed.</p>
<p>"Ephiny?" She snapped to attention and looked at Queen Melosa, "are you okay?"</p>
<p>"I-um- I don't want- I don't want." Ephiny just shook her head; she had not looked this vulnerable since before her mother died. She looked like she was about to panic; Patron Hitta was quick.</p>
<p>"Okay, deep breaths." She stepped forward and placed her hands on Ephiny's shoulders. "I think the best course of action is to have separate conversations." She wrapped her arm around Ephiny and held her protectively in one arm. "I will talk with Ephiny first, and later we can talk?" She looked to Velasca, who only crossed her arms in her usual defiance. "Come with me, Ephiny," Patron Hitta led Ephiny to a small shrine of Hestia; this is where Hitta spent most of her days. She would teach here under her guidance. She sat them down, poured Ephiny some tea, and once calm enough, just started talking. By the end, Ephiny felt a bit awkward but at ease. "Do you have questions?"</p>
<p>"No, thank you." Patron Hitta chuckled and took Ephiny's hands back in her own.</p>
<p>"My door is always open if you ever have any questions. The same goes for any of the patrons here. Ephiny, when you are older, you will learn more about life. It's not always about fighting or being a warrior, which is honorable, but you are also an amazon. We are more than just fighters; we're a family, a community, we strive to bring understanding. A knowledge that most women in this world are denied, it's a man's world, not because it should be but because we let them have it. I want you to put your best boot forward; I want you to train your soul as much as your body; because they are not separate. Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"</p>
<p>"I do. I will try."</p>
<p>"and that is all we hope for and more. You are a fantastic warrior, strong, agile, but now we build you into an amazon. The lessons never end with us; we grow and learn with each day. A patron's duty is not done until the final days. My dear, I will always teach, and I'm proud that I get to teach you- stubborn one." Ephiny wrapped her arms around Hitta, and the old woman smiled. "We live this life so we can one day be reunited with those we lost. You will see her again; it's time to heal."</p>
<p>The talks had left both girls vulnerable, and they were awkward for a little bit. "We should continue talking with them." Ephiny prompted, and Velasca only nodded in agreement. "Hitta made good points."</p>
<p>"She did."</p>
<p>"Okay." Getting back into a routine, they would spend the morning down by the training grounds. Watching the warriors train before heading home and starting their own workout. It was just the routine; as time passed and they took more classes with the patrons, they drifted slightly. Still, they stayed friends, and they even had a few fun nights, but the emotional intimacy fizzed, and it was all physical.</p>
<hr/>
<p>The leaves were changing, and today Velasca celebrated her fifteenth season. However, she stood with her arms crossed and a scowl on her face. Ephiny was shaking her by the shoulders in desperation, "Velasca! Just a week, come on, please!" Velasca was a week older and able to join the sisters, but Ephiny was trying to convince her to wait. "You promised, you said we'd go in together."</p>
<p>"I didn't think you'd hold me to it." The look on Ephiny's face was pathetic, and Velasca couldn't help but give in. "I will wait, but you owe me one." Ephiny wrapped her arms around Velasca and smiled, "yes, yes, get off." She laughed as Ephiny picked her up and spun her around.</p>
<p>That first morning on Ephiny's fifteenth season, they decided on a morning run. Eponin saw them and shook her head in disbelief. "Did you seriously do a prerun?" Eponin just laughed, full-on snorting that sounded like a frog being squashed by a boulder. "They did a prerun," She told another warrior as she walked by, grabbing a piece of bread from a basket. "So many regrets!" She yelled over her shoulder, "I'll pray for you!" Ephiny and Velasca rolled their eyes before washing up. They always did a pre-day workout.</p>
<p>"I've been waiting for this day," Jessah, war mistress and enforcer of the tribe, stood with a smile. She had been the right hand of Ephiny's mother and, when she passed, took her place as protector of law. "Piff, lass," They hated those nicknames, but they could do nothing about it. She took them both into a hug, which they accepted begrudgingly. "I promised both your mothers I would take care of your training the day it came. Selina was an exceptional warrior," Velasca stood nervously; it was the first time Ephiny saw anything but that cold emotion she had come to know. "Fara made a promise to your mother but sadly could not fulfill it. Instead, it fell upon me at her last request. I promised Fara and Queen Melosa I would see to both of you. I'm glad I can keep that promise."</p>
<p>Ephiny had seen the training grounds many times, but now she stood on them as a warrior. Each group was run by an older warrior; they would prepare the young ones for battle. Jessah would be taking over the first to four-season warriors, "Young sisters, gather. Today five of you will join us here on the training grounds- officially." The sisters chuckled and looked over to Ephiny and Velasca, who just smirked. "Today, we see where you place among the warriors. We shall test your skills, see what we can make of you." Melosa stopped by in the middle of the day to check on the girl's progress. "They are remarkable and strong, Queen Melosa. They are equal to those of third-season warriors, but I'm not going to push them ahead. They need to be humbled just a little bit before I bump them; they are cocky."</p>
<p>"Keep me up to date; you are the best for this." Jessah nodded and gave the queen a small bow.</p>
<p>"I will see you later for your private training; a queen's training is never done." Jessah turned back to the girls and called out, "time for a life lesson, Solari, ropes." Solari nodded and grabbed a sack, and dragged it to the center. "It's time to show you how to scale trees properly and traverse. This will be the most effective way to travel in dangerous situations." Ephiny continued to stay focused during all her warrior training; she wanted to master everything she could. As a young amazon, you learned the basics, but until you were a warrior- so much was kept from you.</p>
<p>It was a humbling experience, and it took Ephiny a while to get it just right. She would get frustrated, but then the others would come and show her tricks. Solari stepped beside her and guided her hands, showing her the perfect knots. "...and you have yourself a perfect loop." Ephiny cleared her throat and nodded, trying hard not to blush.</p>
<p>"T-thanks." Solari just smiled before stepping back so Ephiny could try it again. She eventually got it and then showed Velasca, as she kept insisting she needed no help. "Velasca, let them help you. They can teach us things we do not know; it's why we are here. Think of this as an opportunity of convenience." Velasca nodded her approval.</p>
<p>"I like that. Very well,"</p>
<p>"Loosen up."</p>
<p>"I will try."</p>
<p>"Good." At the end of the day, Ephiny and Velasca were resting near the river. Both sore from head to toe, and now they understood why Eponin got such a laugh. "It gets easier; I can promise you that. I could barely move my first day." They looked up to see Solari; she was smiling down at both of them. "You two were great,"</p>
<p>"Thanks, we've been waiting for this day." Velasca slowly sat up and watched as the group gathered around, sitting down to chat and congratulate. Velasca was joining in and enjoying others' company; Ephiny was very impressed with her sudden turnaround.</p>
<p>"Velasca," Chilapa smiled across at her and reached her hand out, which the warrior took on instinct. "We'd like to be friends with you. You've been distant for a long time, and I hope this day has brought you a sense of sisterhood? You have so much anger inside, and we want to help." Chilapa sighed when Velasca pulled away from her touch.</p>
<p>"While I appreciate the sentiment, I rather keep my anger. It keeps me focused on my future goals; however, I would like friendship very much. This will do." Chilapa couldn't help but crack a smile and nod, "I take my leave." She stood up and looked down at Ephiny, "Coming?"</p>
<p>"I'm just going to sit here for a bit; it still hurts to move." Velasca poked Ephiny's arm with her foot, "gah." Chuckling, she walked off and headed for home.</p>
<p>"That went better than I thought; I expected to be punched in the face." Chilapa sighed.</p>
<p>"She has a right to be angry, Chilapa."</p>
<p>"We all have a right to be angry, Eph, but it is not healthy." As Solari butted in, Eponin scaled down from the trees and scared them half to death. "Ninny!"</p>
<p>"Lessons are never over, friends; if I were the enemy, you would have been dead. I've been up there for ages; I thought maybe one of you would have heard me." Eponin plopped down next to Ephiny and wrapped an arm around her. "Hey, Eph, how'd that morning run work out for you?" Ephiny smacked Eponin in the face with her empty waterskin. "Oof, son of a bac- that was good! Drink up," Eponin place her waterskin in Ephiny's lap with a smile.</p>
<p>"Thanks."</p>
<p>"So, you doing okay?" Eponin's voice softened, and her embrace more gentle. "We've missed you, little sister." Ephiny kept to herself since her mother died, and until this moment, she hadn't felt guilty about it.</p>
<p>"Yeah, haven't been feeling social. I'm angry, but I'm trying not to be."</p>
<p>"Your mom was a great warrior and a good teacher. She taught us that anger consumes your soul and leads you away from your path. It could damn you to the land of the dead, and we don't want that for you." She remembered her mother's teachings, but it was hard to ignore all the pain. She leaned against Eponin for some comfort; she had always been there for Ephiny.</p>
<p>"I'm just so angry."</p>
<p>"Anger is a normal reaction to loss and sorrow, but we have to work through that. We have to grow from it and think about the future and not live with that what-ifs." Eponin ran her fingers through Ephiny's curls and gave her a smile.</p>
<p>"We've all lost the ones we love," Solari placed a hand on Ephiny's and squeezed, "My sister, my aunt, my mother, and many friends. I thought the pain would never end, but I found comfort in my sisters. Eponin and Chilapa helped me through it, and we want to help you."</p>
<p>"Velasca helps," Ephiny closed her eyes, willing herself not to cry.</p>
<p>"I know she's your best friend and then some, but she's pulling you down a terrible path. You can break free from that anger, and she could too if she tried. If not, her anger might get her killed one day." Eponin was trying hard to get Ephiny to see the light at the end of the tunnel.</p>
<p>"My anger, It's been my focus."</p>
<p>"It's not healthy." Eponin sighed and pulled Ephiny into a full hug. "We miss you; we miss the happy kid." Solari and Chilapa joined in on the hug and just held her as Ephiny finally gave in to the tears.</p>
<p>"I miss her too."</p>
<hr/>
<p>It took time, but eventually, they started to see that happy kid again. Her light was still diminished, but she made better choices. Talking with the patrons, asking questions, and taking in the lessons. She used the training grounds to burn off the rage and build her warrior physique. She had already begun to fill out before, but she and Velasca started to tone and sculpt with the proper training. The other girls started to take notice, and Ephiny noticed them noticing. Velasca found the entire display repulsive and rolled her eyes.</p>
<p>"It's disgusting; look how they drool over you."</p>
<p>"Not just me they are looking at, Velasca. They've been staring at you too." Ephiny inched closer with a grin, "and what's not to love?" She winked.</p>
<p>"Flattery will get you everywhere." Velasca leaned in and kissed her lips once, "I'll reward you later if you're still interested?"</p>
<p>"and why wouldn't I be?"</p>
<p>"Never mind, don't worry about it." Velasca didn't want to talk about it, but Ephiny wouldn't let it go.</p>
<p>"Velasca, why wouldn't I be?"</p>
<p>"Let's just say another warrior has taken an interest in you."</p>
<p>"and why would I fall into this other warrior bed?"</p>
<p>"Because she's your dream girl, and I'm just a fuck."</p>
<p>"Dreams girls come and go, and you are not just a fuck." Ephiny sighed and pulled Velasca away from prying eyes. Ducking behind a hut, she reached up and cupped Velasca's face. "Who is this dream girl who has you so worried?"</p>
<p>"Solari," Ephiny sighed, "she likes you, and it's obvious."</p>
<p>"I like her, but I'm not with Solari; I'm with you." Leaning up, she pressed a kiss to Velasca's lips.</p>
<p>"When she looks at me, she gives me that intense stare. If looks could kill, I'd be dead a thousand times over." Ephiny's mouth went a little dry as Velasca's lips grazed her own; she closed the distance and pressed Velasca against the hut.</p>
<p>"No more crazy talk; let's go home." Ephiny couldn't stop thinking about what Velasca said; a week went by, and she started to watch Solari more closely. It was true. The look she gave Velasca was pure jealousy.</p>
<p>"We need to talk," Ephiny propelled down next to Solari during one of her training sessions. Solari nearly fell from the tree but caught herself, "Sorry, but this is important."</p>
<p>"What is it? I'm supposed to be an enemy for the young warriors."</p>
<p>"I've been watching you. Why are you giving Velasca death stares?" That caught Solari off guard; she wasn't expecting Ephiny to just come out and say it.</p>
<p>"Now is not the time for this conversation. I will talk to you later. I have a lesson to teach," Ephiny felt like arguing, but Solari would probably just throw her from the tree if she continued. She met with Solari later for lunch, and they sat and talked about it. "I'm sorry, I can not help the way I feel. I personally think Velasca is terrible for you. You've been working on making yourself a better warrior, heart, and soul. She has not changed her path in the lightest and is dragging you down with her."</p>
<p>"Solari, I love her, and I love you, but I'm with her." Ephiny looked around nervously, hoping Velasca wasn't sneaking nearby. "If things were different, maybe, but they're not."</p>
<p>"You look at me?" Solari reached out and touched Ephiny's hand.</p>
<p>"I do, always have."</p>
<p>"I make you nervous when I'm close?" Solari could feel Ephiny's hand tremble, which she pulled away.</p>
<p>"No," Solari smirked at Ephiny's lie.</p>
<p>"Work on that game face a bit more, little sister."</p>
<p>"Will do, but I need you to back off. Leave Velasca alone and keep your game face on, got it?"</p>
<p>"Got it," Ephiny had been interested in Solari for a long time, but then her mother died, and the only thing that mattered was revenge. She found comfort with Velasca, and that turned into something more. Companionship and understanding, Velasca got her, and no one else did. Things weren't always good with Velasca; they fought- a lot, and sometimes Velasca got a little rough. Ephiny just gave it right back, and they would make up, and things would be good.</p>
<p>"Still mad?" Velasca was running along the trees, Ephiny following right beside her. They both had their duties to perform and didn't get a chance to talk before the day started. The sudden appearance of Ephiny actually scared Velasca; she almost fell to her doom.</p>
<p>"Don't sneak up on people; what is wrong with you?" Velasca came to a sudden stop when Ephiny wrapped a rope around her, yanked her back to the tree trunk. "Ephiny!"</p>
<p>"Kiss me," She swung around and secured her quarry to the tree, grinning as Velasca relaxed and shook her head. She was mere inches from Velasca's face, "kiss me."</p>
<p>"Act your age, sister." She could feel Velasca's breath quicken.</p>
<p>"If I say sorry will you give me a kiss?" Ephiny playfully nibbled her bottom lip; it got Velasca every damn time. Thankfully, Velasca was skilled with escaping ropes and was already free. Her free hand went to the back of Ephiny's head and brought her in for a kiss. "Damn you."</p>
<p>"You'll pay for this little trick, I promise you that. I'll see you later, be ready for me." Ephiny swallowed hard; she wasn't sure what she would find when she got home.</p>
<hr/>
<p>Over the next couple of years, things started to sour between them. Velasca was beginning to adopt certain behaviors that Ephiny wasn't into. She became a little more controlling, rough and loved giving pain and seeing what it did. When Ephiny told her she needed to back off a little, Velasca wouldn't let her. Velasca said no one would understand, and she should just shut up and take it. She was stuck and too scared to say anything to anyone, so she did just take it.</p>
<p>"It's time for a change, Ephiny. I expect you to stand with me when the time comes."</p>
<p>"What are you talking about?"</p>
<p>"You'll see," Ephiny was confused, but it wouldn't take long for Velasca to reveal whatever she was planning. "be ready and don't disappoint me." A few days later, a fight broke out in the center of the village. Velasca held a pair of chobos in her hand and smiled at Queen Melosa. "I demand the challenge!"</p>
<p>Ephiny rushed forward and pushed her back, "what are you doing? You can't just demand something like that. She could kill you," The look on Melosa's face was blank, but Ephiny knew she was hurting. "This is madness!"</p>
<p>"She keeps peace with murderers, beasts that hide behind a piece of parchment. Will that stop them from hunting on our lands? No!" She yelled out so everyone could hear, "She is weak, and we need to defeat this enemy who murders our sisters." She lowered her voice after that, taking Ephiny's shoulders in her hands. "We have been waiting for this since our mothers' were taken from us. We can finally be rid of these beasts." Velasca smiled, "Once I win, we will discuss our future." Ephiny stood dumbfounded; she was trying to process all this information. She knew there would be no we but her; Ephiny would be boiled down to a consort or worse. "The mask will be mine; no one will stand in my way!" She watched as Velasca walked back to the center and pointed her chobos at Melosa.</p>
<p>"I keep us alive by maintaining peace. We have no reason to start a fight with Tyldus. We are not ready to face his army." Melosa yelled.</p>
<p>"You're not ready, but I am."</p>
<p>"Have the furies finally driven you mad?" Melosa sighed, "I hate them as much as you do."</p>
<p>"Doubtful, I've issued the challenge you must accept it."</p>
<p>"You understand what you are about to do? If you lose, your life is forfeit!" Melosa sighed as Velasca said nothing, just dug her foot into the dirt, ready to make the attack. "The path of vengeance is not our way; your heart must be full of courage. I'm giving you one last chance to stop this nonsense." Velasca had no intention of giving up; she already made up her mind.</p>
<p>"Fight me!"</p>
<p>"Very well," She looked around at the other sisters, "Anyone who sides with her will be banished and left to fend for themselves. Pick your side, and I suggest you choose wisely." Melosa looked at Ephiny when she said that; she felt sick to her stomach. She didn't want this, but she had to pick a side. Tears ran down her face as she stood in the center; Velasca held out her hand and beckoned her forward.</p>
<p>"Stand with me," Ephiny made her way over to Velasca, the sisters went to reach for her, but she was already far from their grasp. "Stand against our enemy." Ephiny leaned in and pressed a kiss to her cheek before pulling back.</p>
<p>"I made an oath to protect this village, my queen, and my princess. I swore loyalty to them both and to this tribe. War will come but not before a just cause, I'm sorry." Ephiny's voice was full of emotion; she was scared and confused. She started to back towards Melosa and watched as Velasca's body shuttered with rage. "Don't-" Her hand went to her belt; a second later, a dagger released and flew towards Ephiny. She closed her eyes, but the pain never came. When she opened them, she saw the blade mere inches from her face; Solari held it in her hand. "Solari," Ephiny's voice was the smallest it had ever been, full of fear and hurt. Velasca tried to kill her for simply saying no, after everything they went through.</p>
<p>"Go, go to Eponin." Ephiny's legs barely held her up, but she stumbled her way to Eponin's arms; the warrior wrapped her uptight. "I would send you to the land of dead myself, if not for the challenge posed."</p>
<p>"When I win, you'll get that chance."</p>
<p>"You stand no chance against our queen, and we will never accept you if by some miracle you do win." Ephiny didn't want any part of this; she lost her best friend and lover in one word. Velasca had never beaten Melosa in a fight, even when they were just playing around. The odds were not in Velasca's favor, even if she was a capable warrior. Solari returned to her side and took over from Eponin, "stand by us, and you'll be safe." Solari wrapped her arm around Ephiny and straightened her up. "Stand tall; I got you."</p>
<p>Ephiny watched as Melosa and Velasca went back and forth. It was clear that Velasca was outmatched, she got a few good hits, but Melosa was toying with her out of anger. It didn't take long for Melosa to pin her to the ground, Chobos pressed into her neck.</p>
<p>"Do it!" Velasca screamed, but Melosa could not finish it.</p>
<p>"I can not, and you know that. You were a daughter to me; I took you in, loved you even with all your anger. I hope you find your way, now go, rule over your new tribe and leave here. Do not return, and if you do, I will kill you. Get out!"</p>
<p>"You should have killed me," Ephiny didn't know how to deal with this, knowing that Velasca was still out there.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. WITHOUT YOU & PURIFICATION</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>AN: Hurt/Comfort, Angst, mentions of abuse, depression, anxiety. This is basically the chapter of Ephiny going through the motions of healing, it's heavy.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ephiny was finally free, but it didn't feel that way. Losing Velasca was painful, but it shouldn't be. The betrayal should have thrown all of that out the window, but it only added to her pain. Not all memories were good, but some were, and that is what she clung to. She still got up and prepared herself for the day, doing the tasks that Velasca once set out for her. Laying out clothes, preparing the washbasin, picking the best pieces of fruit, and putting them on a plate for consumption. She didn't notice; she just did them because it was what she always did.</p>
<p>"What are you doing?" Ephiny looked up to see Terreis in the doorway. Ephiny was holding some of Velasca's old leathers, scrubbing it.</p>
<p>"Laundry, why?"</p>
<p>"You don't have to clean her clothes anymore." Ephiny looked down to see the leathers; realization crossed her face.</p>
<p>"I didn't-" Ephiny shook her head before tossing the clothes to the ground.</p>
<p>"She's gone."</p>
<p>"Yes, yes she is." Ephiny tried to shut herself off; she didn't want to feel anymore. Everyday was becoming too much, and she couldn't breathe most mornings. She would wake up early just so she could stay curled up in bed, sob, gathering herself for what came next. Sleeping in the hut, she shared with Velasca became suffocating. She started sleeping in the trees or at the stables, but eventually, she just moved into an abandoned shack at the edge of the village. Ephiny tried to understand what happened, how it got so wrong?</p>
<hr/>
<p>"It has been a long time since I just stopped and soaked my feet?" Ephiny sat next to Queen Melosa beside the riverbend, feet dipped in the water as they talked. "How are you doing, Little Sister?"</p>
<p>"I'm doing, my queen. You?"</p>
<p>"Today is better. I cannot focus on anything but my tribe. You are my first priority; so, what is wrong?" Melosa could see that Ephiny was struggling, and she wanted honesty; she could get that from Ephiny by simply asking.</p>
<p>"I betrayed her." Ephiny looked absolutely crestfallen, "I should not feel that way; I know that." Ephiny felt Melosa's hand on her shoulder, her eyes closed.</p>
<p>"No, she betrayed her tribe. You did what was right and stood by your sisters, and you stood by me."</p>
<p>"I'm lost."</p>
<p>"Most warriors are. We fight to find our way. I'm not perfect, and I have a temper, but I strive to be fair and hear the situation. We will make it through."</p>
<p>"How do I breathe without her?" Ephiny hated feeling this way; she hated being so attached. She had done it all her life, and she was still doing it.</p>
<p>"Ephiny, she is gone, and you are still here. Your oath is to this tribe, nation, and most importantly to your queen." In private moments, Melosa did share some favor with certain warriors. She felt responsible for not only her sister but for Ephiny. She wrapped an arm around her and placed Ephiny's head on her shoulder. "After the loss of my mother, Fara helped me through a bad time. I worked out these emotions with her on the training grounds. It's not a long-term fix, but it will help if you do it enough. I want you to run until your legs give out, your lungs burn, and the need of this traitorous daughter of mine is gone from you. And once that is done, I will sign you up for the purification ritual."</p>
<p>"Melosa, I-"</p>
<p>"I'm your queen, and this was not a debate. Come," Ephiny was led down to the training grounds where Jessah was running the last few drills of the day. "War master, a word?"</p>
<p>"Of course, my Queen," Jessah dismissed the warriors before making her way over, "What can I do for you?"</p>
<p>"I need you to help Ephiny like Fara helped me. She needs to burn the need out of her body; she is set to run." That was all Jessah needed to hear; she just nodded her head and looked to Ephiny with a stern expression. "She is to finish, to push, see that it is done. After, we do the ritual with the sisters."</p>
<p>"Yes, of course," Jessah took Ephiny by the shoulder and started to pull her. "Come with me."</p>
<p>"Queen Melosa," Ephiny called over her shoulder.</p>
<p>"Trust me, Little Sister, go with Jessah." All Ephiny could do was nod.</p>
<p>"Ephiny," She stopped suddenly and looked up at Jessah, nerves rushing through her. "You will train with me for as long as it takes. I will push and push until you curse my name, but in the end, you will thank me, now- run." Ephiny didn't know how this was supposed to get rid of her problem. She had run thousands of times before, but something about this was different. "Keep going," Ephiny looked to Jessah as she ran by, pushing herself through the initial burn. Unsure how long she ran, her legs finally started to give out. Her breath was erratic, but moments later, Jessah was there, "keep going, don't stop."</p>
<p>"I can't-" Ephiny collapsed to her knee, but Jessah lifts her back up and pushes her forward.</p>
<p>"You are the daughter of Fara, fierce warrior, enforcer of the old law. You are not a quitter; you are a fighter, a survivor- now I said run!" Ephiny steeled herself before taking off again; this time, Jessah followed after her. "Keep going," Velasca's face was still there, images of her smile, those eyes. She pushed harder, and not only did she run but started to use the field, jumping over the hurdles and lifting heavy sacks of grain. "That's it, keep going. Ignore the burning and work through it. Who are you?"</p>
<p>"An amazon." Ephiny forced the words from her lips, her chest heaving.</p>
<p>"What else?"</p>
<p>"A warrior."</p>
<p>"What else?"</p>
<p>"A survivor."</p>
<p>"That's right. Keep going, to the edge of the forest and back- go." Ephiny took off again and reached the edge of the trees, she turned and headed back towards Jessah, but halfway her legs finally gave out. Velasca was still there…</p>
<p>"Why, why, why?" Ephiny collapsed in a fit of rage, her fists slamming into the ground with each question. She kept beating the ground and screaming; Jessah ran up beside her and took hold. Ephiny's knuckles were broken open, "Leave me!"</p>
<p>"Good gods, girl." Jessah pulled the warrior to her and just held her there as she struggled to break free. "Stop, easy, that's it." In the end, Ephiny refused the purification ritual. She saw no connection to the spiritual aspect; it would do her no good. She stuck with the run and extra hours of training, pushing herself to the limits. She trained with Jessah, the experienced warrior who kept her focused. Ephiny's warrior prowess continued to grow, but her virtue took a downward spiral. Since Velasca's departure, she had needs to be filled; she found others to give her those needs. She didn't treat the others like Velasca treated her, but she had no attachment to them. Ephiny shut off her emotions, all but the anger and her ability to obey her superiors. She didn't care what other people thought of her anymore; she knew what was in her heart- nothing. Her friends watched as she flirted with every of-age warrior and shook their heads.</p>
<p>"How is that okay? How have the patron mothers not noticing this kind of behavior towards their daughters?" Solari watched as Ephiny slapped the ass of her current fling before sending her off. "I need to talk to her about this."</p>
<p>"Solari, I know you think it will help, but it won't. Just leave it; she is not going to listen to you." Eponin tried, but Solari was already marching over to the table. "This is not gonna end well." Eponin threw her arm around Chilapa with a half-smile.</p>
<p>"Nothing we can do about it." Chilapa pinched the bridge of her nose.</p>
<p>"Will you ever settle on one amazon? Or will you continue to sleep with every warrior of age?" Ephiny didn't even flinch; she just took another bite of bread and smirked. "This is funny to you? Teaching our youth to be harlots like the world thinks we are?" Ephiny placed a finger up as she finished chewing, took a sip of water to wash down the bread.</p>
<p>"I found learning about sex first hand is better than any talk a patron can give. I'm just doing my part, Solari. Plus, they don't bother me while I eat or nag me about love. And when we're done, they go home." They shared a brief year-long romance, but Ephiny's heart wasn't in it. She was still broken from her time with Velasca, she wasn't ready, but she didn't know how to say that. How do you tell the people you care about that your best friend practically enslaved you for her own pleasure? She couldn't; she was too ashamed.</p>
<p>Solari slammed her fist down in anger and knocked the bowl off the table. Memories flooded back into Ephiny head, the times she shared with Velasca in that hut. She nearly fell off the bench but caught herself and held her ground. "You have forgotten everything your mother taught you. You doom yourself to the land of the dead on this path. Have no shame?" Ephiny slowly stood and walked around the table to square off with Solari; she was shaking.</p>
<p>"You know nothing of my path or the shame I live with. I can do what I want with my body. I'm not her's anymore, and I have control! And that is what matters!" Ephiny stormed off and left Solari stunned and the room still. Solari was about to go after her, but Eponin stopped her.</p>
<p>"You can't make this better, not right now." Eponin wrapped her arm around Solari and sighed, "You're too close to the problem. Stay with Chilapa; I'm going to find Terreis."</p>
<p>"Eponin, what is happening?" Solari felt sick, she wasn't sure what just happened, but it wasn't good.</p>
<p>"I'll explain later; just stay with Chilapa and wait. Please?" Solari could only nod in Eponin's direction before the warrior ran off.</p>
<p>Ephiny ran and ran until her legs started to give, and her lungs burned. Her happiness depleted; she felt no one could help her from this pain. "Ephiny," She looks up from her kneeling position on the ground to see Terreis. "Let's take a walk?" Side by side, they walked along the training grounds and towards the forest path. The burning slowly faded, and her lungs filled back with air, "Things were simple when we were children. We had no big expectations, just tasks, studies, and then we could play and have no care in the world. All of us were such good friends, close, we could talk to each other. It's been a hard path for you, little sister, and we're all worried about you."</p>
<p>"The point?"</p>
<p>"I want you to talk to me about what happened."</p>
<p>"Solari butted her nose in where it didn't belong. I lost my temper and stormed off. I'll go say sorry, and things will be fine."</p>
<p>"Ephiny, you told Solari that your body wasn't 'hers' anymore. She says you weren't talking about her, so, who were you talking about?" Ephiny's body language shifted and got on the defensive.</p>
<p>"Doesn't matter; I don't want to talk about it."</p>
<p>"Okay, but if you do, I'm right here." Terreis waited, but Ephiny said nothing and stood as still as stone. Fists clenched, "You know where to find me when you're ready." Terreis cupped her face and kissed her forehead with a smile, "I'll always be here for you." Then she made her way down the path and back towards home. Terreis expected Ephiny to follow and meet her about halfway, but she didn't. It was several hours later when a tired, distressed, and emotional mess appeared at her hut. Tears streaming down Ephiny's face, "Little sister?" She opened her arms, and Ephiny fell into them and clung to her sister as tight as she could. "These need mending," Ephiny's knuckles were split wide, "what were you hitting?" Ephiny did not answer; she just clung to her sister for support. "I'm here; just let it out."</p>
<p>It took some time to calm her down. Terreis built a tiny blanket fort like the one they made as children. She grabbed some drinks, some food and told the guard she did not want to be disturbed- unless it was Melosa.</p>
<p>"We were always by each other's side, every waking moment." Ephiny's voice had no other emotion but sadness, despair. "We shared our first everything together, everything. She tried to kill me as if nothing mattered; I meant nothing to her. I'm angry because I miss her; I shouldn't miss her."</p>
<p>"Of course you should; she was your best friend. Why shouldn't you?"</p>
<p>"Because I was nothing to her but a plaything, I was just her toy. I had tasks, I had expectations, I had a set time for everything. She would beat me for fun because she liked what pain did to people; she would pretend it was a training exercise, but she wouldn't stop when I asked. Eventually, I just expected it and lived with it and pretended it was normal. I'm a warrior, and I couldn't stop her, I couldn't stop her." Ephiny collapsed against Terreis and started to cry again.</p>
<p>"You are so dear to me. I wish I could take all this pain away." Terreis wiped at her own face; hearing this broke her heart. How did she not see it before? "When you are ready, you should talk to your friends, tell them what's going on. So they can understand what you are going through because they can see your destructive path, but they don't know why you are walking it."</p>
<p>"How do I say sorry for all the hurt I caused?"</p>
<p>"It's as simple as saying sorry; it's a good place to start. Your friends will stand by you because they know you're hurting."</p>
<p>It didn't happen right away. It took some time for Ephiny to find the courage. Terreis just told them to be patient, and when she was ready, they would talk. About three more breakdowns and a near-death experience at the hands of a warlord passing through- Ephiny finally decided it was time to talk. She was just pushing everyone away, and they were starting to let her, and it scared her.</p>
<p>"I want to do this before I lose my nerve." Terreis gathered the girls at Ephiny's request and sat them down in her home. Ephiny looked like she had been through hell. Her face was still bruised, and she had arrow wounds from the battle.</p>
<p>"We're listening," Solari sat with a stoic expression; she was trying to keep her own emotions in check- it was hard.</p>
<p>"Okay," It took Ephiny a minute to find her voice, but she started to talk. She told them what happened with Velasca and how long it had been going on. What was expected, what she's been feeling, how she was scared to say anything. She believed she couldn't beat Velasca; she was too scared to try. "...I'm lost, numb, I don't know how to get back."</p>
<p>"Little Sister, you do not have to go through this alone- not anymore." Eponin wrapped her up in a tight hug, which Ephiny returned. No more tears, Ephiny was just numb, but she could feel her sister's love, and that is what she needed.</p>
<p>"We should have known," Chilapa pressed a kiss to Ephiny's temple, wrapping her up in comfort. Her arms also around Eponin, "I knew something was wrong, but I didn't imagine-" Chilapa sighed heavily.</p>
<p>"You had no way to know; I didn't even know. I thought it was normal, and then once she was gone, I could sit and think about it. Love is not supposed to hurt like that; she didn't love me. She just wanted someone to worship her." Ephiny finally looked over at Solari, who was fighting back the tears. "I'm sorry for hurting you." Ephiny's voice was just above a whisper, hard, but her eyes were soft.</p>
<p>"No," Solari moved closer and took Ephiny's hands, "I'm sorry for judging your actions before understanding them. It makes sense now that we have the bigger picture. Ephiny, you should talk to Patron Hitta about this?"</p>
<p>"I don't know if I can. It was hard enough talking about it with all of you." They all settled on the floor among the blankets and pillows Terreis set out.</p>
<p>"Patron Hitta will understand," Terreis gave her best smile and joined them, "but only when you are ready. We will not push."</p>
<p>"How could anyone understand?" Ephiny rested against Eponin; she was always there to lean on.</p>
<p>"Not all amazons grow up in the village," Ephiny sensed that Terreis knew a lot more than she was willing to say. "Do you wish to speak with her?"</p>
<p>"Not yet, I can't right now."</p>
<p>"Okay, I will tell her to expect you eventually. Okay?"</p>
<p>"Okay."</p>
<hr/>
<p>Ephiny found herself at the west side of the village; it was deeper in and secluded from the war camp. This is where the patrons and children lived; the warriors kept them safe from the outside world. The patrons didn't need protection because they could fend for themselves, but they were not warriors like the others. When the time came to choose a side, they decided on the path of nurture instead of destruction- as some would say. She grew up in this little corner of the village; this was her home for the first eight years of her life. After her birth, the war was constant, and Ephiny was kept safe here in the patrons' arms. Her mother would come and see her and spend as many hours as she could a day. Keeping her fed and bonding before running back to Queen Lucina's side. Queen Melosa and Princess Terreis also grew up here; the queen kept them from any and all danger during her rule.</p>
<p>Ephiny had memories here; she was such a wild child. She never stood still. She was always running and jumping once she learned how. The patrons would chase her into the woods and scold her for not paying attention to her studies. When she was older and tasked to watch over some children, she would lose one because she wasn't paying attention. The fondest of memories were those she still had of her mother. Fara would come and scoop her up after a hard day; they would go for a run through the trees. She would cling to her mother's back, eyes wide as the world passed her by. When she was older, she would run alongside her mother, learning all she could. She never had to worry about falling because her mother would always catch her and did several times. They would play hide and seek, and Fara would always let Ephiny find her.</p>
<p>Lately, the memory of her mother's graceful run, her laugh, and even her voice had faded. She was trying so hard to remember her mother's voice, she closed her eyes and thought of the reflections, and it was lost, and it pained her. "Mama, Mama..." Tears fell down her face; she didn't care who saw.</p>
<p>"I'm too old to chase you now. I hope you didn't come here to start trouble?" Patron Vesta was making her way over with a smile, but it faded when she neared. She could see the tears and stress on Ephiny's face, and her heart ached, "Oh, sweet chariot, come here." The use of her old nickname only made more tears fall, and she fell into the old woman's arms. "Oh wild one, tell Vesta what's wrong." Vesta was aging, but she was still powerful and held Ephiny up in her arms.</p>
<p>"I can't remember her voice, I can't-"</p>
<p>"Okay, okay," Vesta led her away from the children and into a hut close by. Ephiny leaned against her, and Vesta just ran her fingers through her curls.</p>
<p>"I need to hear her, I need-"</p>
<p>"Sadly, it is not something within my power, sweet chariot. Oh, I would if I could, I would do anything to hear your mother's voice again, but it's beyond me. Oh child, I know." Vesta just held her and soothed the best she could. "I too would give anything to hear my family's voice again, and one day we will. Until then, we must live as an amazon should so the gates will open for us."</p>
<p>"Vesta, what on earth is-" Patron Hitta opened the door to see Vesta with her arms around Ephiny and sighed sadly. "Oh, dear."</p>
<p>"Sometimes, you just need a good cry." Vesta nodded in Hitta's direction, patting Ephiny's back with each word. "she'll be alright, won't we?" She placed a kiss on the back of Ephiny's head.</p>
<p>"I'll be okay."</p>
<p>"Yes, you will," Hitta walked over to place a hand on Ephiny's back. "Princess Terreis said you might be stopping by soon; I wasn't expecting you this soon. Usually, you like to procrastinate for a day or seven." Ephiny chuckled and rubbed at her face, "There, that is the smile we love to see. Now, care to tell me what's going on?"</p>
<p>"I, it's a lot. I don't know if you have the time?"</p>
<p>"For you, we have all the time Artemis shall grant us." Vesta handed Ephiny a rag to clean her face, "whatever it is, we'll do what we can to make it better."</p>
<p>"I feel this might be the proper time to drink something a little special." Hitta got up and made her way over to a cabinet. It was then Ephiny realized she was in Hitta's hut and not Vesta's. She poured three small cups of liquid and returned, "helps take the edge off a long day."</p>
<p>"Bless you, sister," Vesta took one of the cups and shot it back.</p>
<p>"Patron mothers, party animals, who knew?" Ephiny shook her head with a smile and shot hers back.</p>
<p>"You think you warriors are the life of the party. You have never been to a patron festival quite like ours, not many warriors show, but they are forever changed. I recommend it and if you have any questions, ask Queen Melosa. She is obligated, as is her station."</p>
<p>"I'll keep that in mind." Ephiny would not ask questions; she had no interest in the lifestyle of a patron. She was grateful to have them and knew they were essential to keep the children safe, but what else was there?</p>
<p>"Still so young." Vesta mused.</p>
<p>"And naive, but she'll learn, Vesta."</p>
<p>"And she is still sitting right here." Ephiny hated when they did that, talked about you when you were right in front of them.</p>
<p>"She is, ah yes, there." Vesta tapped her nose.</p>
<p>"Okay, okay- haha."</p>
<p>"Joking aside, we are here to listen." Hitta reached out and cupped Ephiny's chin, always the chin. Ephiny realized most of them cupped her chin to direct her gaze; she had a tendency to pull away. It took one more shot of that liquid before she settled in and told her patrons everything. "I see."</p>
<p>"I feel like I betrayed her, but-"</p>
<p>"No, she betrayed you." Hitta's usual upbeat voice had dropped, and Ephiny noticed this was her authentic voice. No airs, no flourish; this was Hitta. It caught her off guard, but she was grateful for the trust.</p>
<p>"It's nice to see you." At Ephiny's words, Hitta smiled and pressed a kiss to Ephiny's forehead.</p>
<p>"You are old enough to see the truth; no one is as happy and upbeat all the time. We are the way we are because we wish to bring happiness to those with less. We have much to be grateful for even in bad times; they shape us into who we are."</p>
<p>"I feel as though I know nothing about you, about any of you."</p>
<p>"You have not even scratched the surface, Sweet Chariot. You don't learn everything in a small-time, you live, and you grow. Soon you will hit that next path in your life; you will then turn left or right." Vesta poured them another drink, "it's not as simple as warrior or caregiver, plenty of in-betweens."</p>
<p>"How do I make the pain stop?" Ephiny held the cup between her hands, rolling it around. "How do I rid myself of her?"</p>
<p>"The war master has worked with you for a time, but physical is only one part. Now you must work through the spiritual, are you willing to try?" Hitta sipped her drink, waiting for Ephiny's answer as she stared deeply into her cup.</p>
<p>"Guess it can't hurt."</p>
<p>"Good, I will inform shamaness Mela of your decision." Ephiny's eyes went wide; of course, it had to be her.</p>
<p>Before the moon was high in the sky, Ephiny met with Shamaness Mela at the purification hut. She knew what the ritual was, but she never did it before. It was said to be a spiritual experience, but she wasn't the spiritual type. She wasn't sure if this would do much for her, but some said the steam was revitalizing in itself. "I bet you've been waiting for this day? Drive all the impurities out of me?" Ephiny cracked jokes with Shamaness Mela, the oldest amazon in the village. She was brought out as a last resort, as she was frail and not as strong as she once was. She served as a healer, caregiver, and life bringer into the tribe. She was the lead patron around the time of Queen Lucina's mother's rule and raised most of the current patrons- she was their mother.</p>
<p>"Daughter of Fara, your pain has only grown since the last I saw you. Joke if you wish, but I'm here to help. Do you accept this help from the goddess?" Ephiny could not find the words; all she could do was nod her head. The woman moved towards her and placed a calloused hand on her cheek; she could feel the years of warrior training, the hard-worked hands of a seasoned warrior. "This is just to start, but we can only do so much. You must be willing to let the goddess in, and maybe this will help?" Mela placed a hand over Ephiny's heart and smiled, "No jokes, sweet chariot, these images you see are true in your mind's eye. Some day you can hear the voice of loved ones, or images but you must open your heart. Are you ready?"</p>
<p>"I want to believe this will help, but it's hard for me. I will try, I will."</p>
<p>"Very well, we begin." Ephiny was stripped down to nothing. Her body was rubbed with oils anointed by Artemis' priestesses. They emanated a low hum from deep within their throats, sending vibrations throughout her body. It was strange because she didn't expect to feel a simple sound. The feel of the needle-like palm leaves was familiar to her but not in a wrong way. This paled to the lashes she would receive from Velasca; this was a welcomed build and tolerable. The steam from the baths was nothing compared; this heat was more intense in such an enclosed place. She lost all track of time. The moonlight that filtered through the top of the hut, casting her in the goddesses' light, had passed. By the morning, she felt a sense of peace for the first time in years. She still had pain, she still saw Velasca's face, but it would no longer bother her with time. "How do you feel?" Ephiny opened her eyes to see Shamaness Mela. She slowly sat up, and a young priestess was there to wrap her in a towel.</p>
<p>"Peaceful, it's a good feeling."</p>
<p>"Yes, you will continue these with the patrons if you wish for peace to grow. Each time more will be revealed and your path more clear, trust in the goddess."</p>
<p>"I will try."</p>
<p>"Be strong, brave warrior." Shamaness Mela smiled as Ephiny hugged her, "you have much growth to go, but you are on your way."</p>
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<p>For the next five years, all Ephiny did was strive for that growth. She continued her training with Jessah, partook in purification rituals to cleanse her, but she never saw her mother's face once. No family came to her or spoke words of comfort, but that no longer mattered. Ephiny moved her way up in the ranks, all her training had paid off, and she quickly became Melosa's top warrior. Eponin, Chilapa, and Solari were also among the top, and they all worked closely with Terreis.</p>
<p>When Ephiny was given the number one spot, Eponin felt a little offended at first until she was offered a better position.</p>
<p>"What?" Eponin stared at Jessah and Queen Melosa, shock all over her face.</p>
<p>"You would make a wonderful war master, you love to teach, and you are top of your class." Jessah grasped arms with Eponin and smiled, "I start training you for your new position this afternoon."</p>
<p>"But-but what about you?"</p>
<p>"I'll still be here, but I'm getting far too old to be running around through trees. I have pains that are no longer manageable, and I'm at that age where I wish to take it easy."</p>
<p>"Well deserved rest after your years of loyalty to my family, Jessah."</p>
<p>"Thank you, I'm proud of all I have done but don't count me out yet. You still have a lot of learning to do; a queen's training is never done." Jessah smiled at Melosa sweetly. "Eponin, I still have much to teach."</p>
<p>"I-" Eponin just shook her head.</p>
<p>"If you don't want it, I can find someone else?" Jessah teased.</p>
<p>"No, no, no- I want it! I just- trying to wrap my head around it."</p>
<p>"You deserve it, Eponin; you've been teaching for a long time. You were always the older kid, and you looked out for your friends and kept them safe." Queen Melosa took Eponin's arm in her own, "You continue to do that."</p>
<p>"I'll make you proud."</p>
<p>"You already do." After the meeting with Jessah and Queen Melosa, Eponin ran straight to her friends and told them the news.</p>
<p>"That's amazing, Nin!" Chilapa wrapped her arms around her, squeezing the air out of her. "War master, that is perfect for you!"</p>
<p>"Can't- breathe-"</p>
<p>"Oooh, sorry," Chilapa released her with a smile, "You're okay?"</p>
<p>"Wow, what a grip. Yeah, I'm good."</p>
<p>"Big deal, now you get to train punks like me." Ephiny's smile was always lovely to see because you didn't see it often these days.</p>
<p>"Gods save me, can't wait for all that."</p>
<p>"Jokes aside, you do deserve this. You've helped this tribe a lot; you've helped me a lot. Look forward to watching you shine, bright as the moon." Eponin walked over to Ephiny and took her into a hug.</p>
<p>"You'll get there," Eponin whispered.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Hooves & Harlots</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>TW: Death</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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  <p>Progress halted as the threat of new war loomed. Melosa and Tyldus were at each other's throats again. Both parties were encroaching on each other’s lands, seeming to forget where the borders begin and end. They only needed half an excuse to argue these days. The boundaries of each land were becoming more hostile, and peace times were practically over. The warriors had fallen back into protection mode and prepared the caves with essentials just in case.</p>
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  <p>“We’re on patrol today, so we’ll be doubling. Pack extra rations in your packs. We leave just before the sun, our orders from Queen Melosa.” Terreis was all business today, and the girls were worried. She usually was this sweet, demure motherly type, but today she was stern.</p>
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  <p>“Terreis,” Chilapa waited for her to turn before giving a slight bow, “are you alright, princess? You seem a little on edge today?” She watched as Terreis’ features softened, and she smiled.</p>
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  <p>“It’s been a stressful few months, but I’ll be just fine. Thank you for your concern, Chilapa.” Terreis turned to Eponin and smiled, “gear them up, war master.”</p>
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  <p>“Yes, princess.” Eponin turned to the others and waved them on. “Sisters, this way.”</p>
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  <p>“Look at her all official; you must be so proud?” Ephiny leaned in to whisper in Chilapa's ear.</p>
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  <p>“We’re all proud of her; she deserves this.” Chilapa smiled as they walked; she never took her eye off Eponin.</p>
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  <p>“You think you are so sneaky.” Solari came up beside Chilapa, finger poking the warrior’s side. She started to sing softly, “Chilapa and Eponin, kissing in a tree, down by the riverbend where no one can see.”</p>
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  <p>“Oh shut up,” Chilapa playful started to smack her, both trying to put the other in a headlock.</p>
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  <p>“Yes, take a look at Queen Melosa’s mighty warriors, the centaurs doth tremble before them,” Ephiny exclaimed, which now got Eponin’s attention.</p>
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  <p>“Do the three of you want to run drills the rest of the day? I can arrange that with Jessah? Don’t test me; we’re friends, but I got a job to do.” Eponin looked at Chilapa and waved her over, “I like you too.” Eponin winked, and Chilapa blushed. The truth was, Chilapa was the one with the crush and had kept it silent. She thought Eponin had no interest, but apparently, she was wrong.</p>
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  <p>“I-” Eponin gave another wink before walking off.</p>
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  <p>“You’re welcome,” Solari chuckled and snapped the leather strap on Chilapa’s arm.</p>
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  <p>“Solari!” She winced but just continued to stare off towards Eponin.</p>
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  <p>“Like you tell me, one leg in front of the other. You got this.” Ephiny wrapped an arm around her and started to pull her along.</p>
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  <p>“I- I didn’t think-”</p>
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  <p>“Yeah, sometimes we don’t think. Eponin’s like this with everyone, but she looks at you in a special kind of way. I’m surprised you didn’t notice before. Come on before she yells at us some more.”</p>
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  <p> </p>
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  <p>The patrols were uneventful, with no sight of any centaurs or men in the area. However, they did spot two women wandering through the territory. They were taking their time, walking normally, and Ephiny noticed the tall one looking around. The short, bubbly, chipper blonde had no clue they were there, but the tall one stopped and looked around. “She knows we’re here.” Ephiny whispered to Terreis, “we should circle round.” Terreis agrees and signals them to take points.</p>
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  <p> Ephiny didn’t like strangers, they made her nervous, and she already had trust issues. If she had a choice, she’d send them back, but Terreis led the patrol; the choice would be hers. </p>
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  <p>“What was that thing hanging back there from the tree?”</p>
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  <p>“No trespassing sign. This is amazon country.”</p>
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  <p>“Amazons? Do you think we’ll see any?”                    </p>
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  <p>“Almost certainly…” Terreis signaled them to volley some arrows to stop them before scaling down the trees. “Gabrielle,” The tall one showed her the symbol of peace, which she was quick to mimic. </p>
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  <p>“They invade our territory. We should take them to see Queen Melosa.” Terreis agreed and led them back towards the village. The warrior's travel companion seemed very excited at the prospect. Ephiny hoped Gabrielle wouldn't talk the entire way back. </p>
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  <p>“Philosophy and history are among the first things taught to Amazon children...It is a man’s world, Gabrielle, Not because it should be, but because we let them have it. It’s based on a woman’s weakness.” Ephiny rolled her eyes; of course, Terreis would quote Patron Hitta. Ephiny decided to move ahead, keeping an eye on the warrior woman.</p>
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  <p>Ephiny was pinned down by the arrows raining down around them. "Terreis!" Ephiny watched as Terreis fell from the tree, Gabrielle running over to cover her fallen sister. When the arrows stopped, the sisters scaled-down the trees and made their way over.</p>
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  <p>“What you did, only an Amazon would do for another Amazon. I want you to take my rite of caste.”</p>
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  <p>“Terreis,” How could she just give her something like that? Ephiny was in shock.</p>
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  <p>“Please!” Terreis winced.</p>
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  <p>“OK, I’ll take it. Just, don’t, don’t--” Ephiny didn’t know why this girl would risk her life for a stranger? She didn’t have time to think about it. The blonde looked at her, and Ephiny’s eyes were cold. She went to shut down mode, fighting every urge to cry and scream.</p>
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  <p>“Ephiny,” Solari’s hand went to her shoulder, “we need to move.” Ephiny knew Solari was right, they were out in the open, and the assault could start again. She pushed her pain down inside her and whatever sorrow she felt. She carefully laid Terreis down before standing and looking at the other women.</p>
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  <p>“Pitari, Elis, take Terreis and our guests back to the village and tell Melosa what happened. Solari, Eponin, Chilapa, you’re with me- we’re going on a hunt.” Terreis was her sister, as close as a sister could be, and now she was gone. Terreis could make her see reason, talk her down, force her to see the bigger picture. Everyone guessed it was because she was the princess, but it was so much more than that. Her mere presence seemed to calm her, and Ephiny couldn’t explain it.</p>
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  <p>It wasn’t long before the hunting party spotted a centaur heading downriver. He was trying to find a place to cross and get back into the open field. Ephiny made a few calls to her sisters, and they moved in. When she got close, she could see the arrows, the same blue feathers sticking out of the quiver.</p>
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  <p>“Murderer!” She watched as he picked up speed, but she closed in. He was slower in the trees; she just needed one good push. “Come to mama,” She pushed off the branch, flipping into the air, and landed right onto his back. Sword pressed against his throat, “Be still beast,” Ephiny would have slit his throat right there, but punishment would fall upon her. Melosa would want to look upon her sister's murderer, the queen would make the final judgment.</p>
</div><div>
  <hr/>
</div><div>
  <p>Phantes, son of Tyldus the Great and Melosa’s sworn enemy, the murderer of her sister, and he would pay with his own life. She backhanded him across his face, “you have until the mourning period passes to make peace with your gods.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Make peace with your own gods.” Ephiny made sure he was well guarded before she took to her other duties. She needed to talk with Melosa, but she was about to meet with Krycus. He just sat out there beyond both borders as if he were waiting for the boot to drop. While the meeting took place, Ephiny went to get some food. The sisters tried to talk with her, but she needed to be left alone.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Leave, now." They scattered, and Ephiny finished her bowl of stew. When she was done, she headed to Melosa's hut. She knew Melosa would be inside grieving, but she needed to talk to her. “I’m sorry to bother you,” Melosa was staring into a flame, watching a sword burn- Terreis' sword.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Come in,” Ephiny took a knee before looking up, “don’t do that, come, what is it?”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“It’s about Terreis and that blonde girl,” She took a breath to steady herself, “She gave her the rite of caste.” Melosa was stunned, "I don’t know what she was thinking, but it happened.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“What happened between the two of them?”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Naive young girl, taking an interest in our ways. Talking about how she was always the odd girl because she had opinions. When the attack happened, she tried to save Terreis’ life.” Ephiny told Melosa everything that happened.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“This young girl threw herself into harm's way, trying to save my sister?” Ephiny nodded, “Well, I think the caste is valid. Let’s talk with her.” They headed out of the tent and towards the two strangers, Xena left, but Gabrielle stayed behind.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“So are we going to talk about this rite of caste thing?”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“With her dying wish, Terreis bestowed all her rights and possessions to you and her position.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Wait. You mean, I’m an Amazon?”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Terreis was my true sister, the next in the royal line. You’re an Amazon Princess,” Melosa looked at Ephiny, “Make sure she’s taught.” Melosa had to be joking? No way would this girl ever be an amazon; she didn’t have what it took.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Take the princess and get her dressed. I’ll catch up.” A few of the sisters led her away, and Ephiny went to cool off a little bit. When she met up with them at Terreis’ home, she felt the anger all over again. Seeing her wearing Terreis’ things rubbed her the wrong way. “Come, now.” </p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I’m sorry, you must have me mistaken for a pet.” Ephiny rolled her eyes and took a calming breath.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Would you come with me?”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“That’s better.” Oh, gods give me strength.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“From birth, every Amazon is taught to use weapons. Pick your first weapon,” She watched as Gabrielle went down the line, deciding on what weapon she wanted. She landed on the fighting staff, “Eponin,” She tossed the staff to her friend, and the warrior started to twirl it around with ease. “Train her. I have something I need to do.” Ephiny left her alone with Eponin for a while; it was just too hard to be around her right now. </p>
</div><div>
  <p> </p>
</div><div>
  <hr/>
</div><div>
  <p>Ephiny ran and ran and ran some more. The sisters cleared a path for her and kept a distance, knowing this was how Ephiny worked through it. Solari was tempted to go down to her, but she stayed away, recognizing Ephiny needed this time to herself. “She’ll be okay,” Chilapa walked up beside her as they watched Ephiny run.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“When will her pain end?” Solair's voice was filled with sadness.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I’m no oracle. I can not predict something like that. Come, let’s go have something to eat.” Solari gave one last look over her shoulder before following Chilapa to the food tent. “A little comfort food will do us good. Patron Marga has made a wonderful treat." When Ephiny finished her run, she took time to clean herself up before returning. Eponin hinted that Gabrielle had some potential, but she guessed it was Eponin being nice.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“...it’s pretty fun when it’s working.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Fun?” This was life, this was a heritage, but that speech would come later. She took hold of her mother’s fighting staff and stared right at Gabrielle. “This fighting staff was my first weapon. My mother passed it on to me. It saved my life more than once. Centaurs have certain strengths and weaknesses. They’re fast and agile. We use that to our advantage. As a centaur passes at full gallop, the staff goes here, to crack the knee at the joint. This splits the leg forward and drops him to the ground. As the centaur falls, a strike to the lower shoulder dislocates the two front legs. Once the centaur is on the ground, an overhead strike breaks the neck.” The melon smashed, and she knew she got her point across, “death is immediate if they’re lucky. Still fun?” Ephiny watched Gabrielle shake her head, stunned. “Didn’t think so.” Ephiny started to walk off and stopped when she felt soft unskilled hands on her forearm; she fought the urge to pull free.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I’m sorry about your friend.” Ephiny turned to look at this girl, the innocent young face. She couldn’t remember ever being this innocent, this- happy.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Thank you, but I still don’t like you.” Gabrielle’s face dropped, and she felt a small amount of guilt. Ephiny walked off again but stopped as Gabrielle quickly stepped in front of her, “What now?”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I thought Melosa told you to train me?” Ephiny looked up at Eponin, who mouthed, ‘be nice.’ “Right?”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“You don’t want me to train you. I won’t go easy on you. Eponin’s the teacher,” Ephiny leaned in with a smile, “I’m the enforcer,” Ephiny just left Gabrielle standing there, frowning.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Hey, give her time.” Eponin gave her a broad smile, “Death is hard in general, but Terreis was very special to us. You’re in good hands, and I’ll take care of you.” Gabrielle took a good look at Eponin’s face, it was hard to tell, but she was hurting. Gabrielle being here was hard for them, “You ready, princess?”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Ready,” Gabrielle found her place and took a steadying breath. “Eponin, I know I will never replace her, and I wouldn’t dream of trying. I want to learn more about the rite of caste because I don’t know what it means or how to do any of this. I want to make Terreis proud; I want to deserve it.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Terreis would not have given you the caste without you deserving it. So, done and done.” Eponin placed a hand on Gabrielle’s shoulder. “You’ll get there.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“You’ll help me even if it hurts to be around me?”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“This isn’t easy for any of us, but it’s what Terreis thought best. She saw something in you for that brief moment, so yeah, I’ll help. You’re our sister now, and Ephiny will come around; it will take some time. Come on, let’s twirl that staff some more.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Okay!”</p>
</div><div>
  <hr/>
</div><div>
  <p>Ephiny wanted to see the beast, the thing who killed her friend in cold blood. Her hate for the centaurs was multiplied at the sight of him. She inched closer, watching as he started to break free from his ropes. She stopped him, and instantly he began to bolster himself, trying to puff up his chest to make him look more of a man. He was talking big, and she let him know it, “What would you know about centaurs? You despise us, You spit on us.” They did despise them, and she sensed the feeling was mutual.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I had a friend who admired the centaurs. She didn’t see you for the beasts you really are. She felt that one day, we would work together. She thought you were brave and noble people.” Terreis always hated the idea of war, people dying, everyone hurting. Still, in the end, nothing could stop the inevitable clashing of the two tribes.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Well, if your friend likes centaurs so much, where is she now?”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“You killed her.” Phantes was quick to reassure he did not kill Terreis. Ephiny wasn’t sure she believed him at first, but something in his tone. He was either excellent at lying, or he was, in fact, being sincere. Swearing on his father’s name helped his case, an oath that didn’t mean much to her, but she knew it meant something to his people. It was enough to plant a seed of doubt, and she went in search of answers.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Double the guard,” Ephiny knew her sisters would stop Phantes if he tried to escape. She headed back to the scene and looked it over, it was hard to be there, but she was compelled. She wasn’t the only one taking in the scene; Xena was there. In a split decision, she decided to see what the warrior princess was all about. She lost the sparring match, and then Xena saved her life from a centaur.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“...by Krykus, the warlord,” It made sense once said from an outside perspective. Still, they would need proof. The hay sprouts proved others were in the area, and the front hooves' weight proved he was not present.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Melosa will need more,” Ephiny knew Melosa wouldn’t just stop the execution over hay sprouts and hoof prints. So, while at Krykus’ camp, Ephiny snuck into the weapons tent and found centaur arrows. With the proof they needed, they headed back to amazon territory. They made it just in time to stop the execution, but all things came with a price. Ephiny was about to pay hers, “You made the challenge, Gabrielle. You have to follow through. Choose your weapon, or choose your champion.” Betrayal, the look of disappointment in Melosa’s eyes. Ephiny wanted to run over to her, like a young child, and try to explain- but now wasn’t the time. She had to do what was right, even if that meant going back on her oath. This is what Terreis would want; she wouldn’t want an innocent to die in her name.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>When Xena won, she felt a sense of relief but also guilt. Turning her back on Melosa had been a hard choice, “There will be no execution by order of our new Queen.” The defeat of Melosa came just in time, just as Tyldus marched on the village. Xena calmed them down, and Phantes was released, and together they defeated Krykus and made peace with the centaurs. This would not be an easy alliance, but Ephiny knew it was right. She had to admit, Gabrielle had grown on her, and maybe it had something to do with Terreis? She could still feel her; her spirit was lingering. Ephiny would honor her friend’s decision, but it didn’t mean she couldn’t be annoyed with her. She talked way too much...</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Now, I see why you ride the horse.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Now, what’s that supposed to mean?” Ephiny looked over her shoulder.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Eponin?” During the fight, Gabrielle saved her life, and she finally understood what Terreis saw in her. A young version of every amazon here, she was the young kid eager to learn. Ephiny would help Gabrielle in her training, knowing it would be what Terreis wanted. Maybe it would help her accept the death of her sister by welcoming a new one? “This is yours,” She held out her mother’s staff; what better gift for an amazon coming of age?</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I can’t take this. Your mother gave it to you,”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“An Amazon Princess doesn’t refuse a gift from another Amazon. Please, I want you to carry it.” It felt right, and Ephiny had no regrets. “I trust you.” What Ephiny didn’t see were the looks of surprise from her friends, the very friends who tried hard to get her to this point. A time where she could trust again, and this girl had done that.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Thank you,” Eponin placed a gentle hand on Chilapa's shoulder, watching the exchange between the two.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“There she is,” Eponin whispered.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“The fire, the light, that spark.” Chilapa leaned against Eponin.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Gabrielle will be good for her.” Eponin watched as Gabrielle held the staff in her hands, doing a series of twirls and swipes that Eponin showed her.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I did it!” Gabrielle held the staff up in triumph.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Yeah, you did!” Eponin moved over and gave her a high five. Chuckling as Gabrielle winced at the sting, “Oops, sorry, Queen Gabrielle.” Gabrielle was about to make a remark when the voice of Queen Melosa sounded behind her.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Queen Gabrielle,” Ephiny’s heart was in her throat as Melosa made her way over, a stern expression on her face.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“No,” Gabrielle shook her head and waved her hands around. “I could never take your place as Queen. The challenge was simply to get you to listen.” Melosa’s firm features softened, and she gave Gabrielle a smile.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“You still have much to learn, but you are the rightful Queen. Your champion beat me, and the position of power is yours.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I can’t stay here. My place is with Xena.” Melosa could only nod, “but I do want to learn more about amazons. I want to learn everything that was kept from me.” Melosa’s hand went to Gabrielle’s cheek.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I see what Terreis saw in you, and I know you will be good for our nation. Not only for our nation but for our sisters,” Her eyes wandered to Ephiny, who quickly looked away from Melosa’s gaze. “I will help guide you and continue your training with the sisters.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I think we can stay awhile,” Xena chimed in, “We could use a little vacation, and it’s been a while since I enjoyed some amazon hospitality. Do you have those hot springs like the sisters in the north?” Melosa let out a throaty chuckle and nodded her head.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“We do. The royal baths are, of course, welcome to you.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Wonderful,”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“And, of course, any companion the champion of the queen wishes to have by her side?” Xena cracked a smile at Melosa’s words.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I got all the companionship I could ever need.” Xena wrapped her arm around Gabrielle’s shoulder, and the blonde blushed. Melosa just nodded her approval before looking back at Gabrielle with a smile.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“You have a lot to learn, but please enjoy the spring. Relax, and when you’re ready, we’ll take a trip to the patrons.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Patrons?” Gabrielle looked to Xena, who nodded her head. “Who are the patrons?”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“From what I was told during my time in the north. They are tribal leaders, elders, and caregivers to the children and young warriors?” Xena smiled.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Yes, that is part of it. The patrons hold a lot of knowledge of our ways; they can guide you and tell you things not everyone knows. As Queen, you will be given access to all our tribe's secrets, things not even our most decorated warriors get a glimpse of.” Gabrielle looked overwhelmed, and Melosa gave her an easy smile. “But go, take your bath and release the day's tension. I have a few things to get in order and several conversations to be had, Queen Gabrielle.” Melosa gave her a slight bow before heading off to her tent.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Do you think she’s still mad at you?” Ephiny hadn’t realized she was still standing there, fists balled. She looked over at Gabrielle and sighed.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I don’t know; she’s always been hard to read. I should go talk with her and face the music. The sisters will show you to the hot spring. Enjoy it; it’s rather nice.” Ephiny left and headed for Melosa’s home; she knocked and waited for a reply.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Come in, Ephiny.” </p>
</div><div>
  <p>“How’d you know it was me?”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Because you always check on me, no one else bothers. No one but you and Terreis and well-” Melosa was sitting down on her throne, staring off at the mask that once belonged to her sister.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I-"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I won’t lie. It hurt that you stood against me.” Ephiny stood firm, head held high as Melosa spoke. “But you did it for the right reasons. Your decision prevented war, a choice that would have decimated our village.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“I know the decision was the right one, but to hurt you-” Ephiny trailed off, fists clenched as she looked away from Melosa. “-for you to be disappointed in me.”</p>
</div><div>
  <p>“Little sister,” Melosa stood and walked over to Ephiny, taking her in for a hug. Ephiny did not hesitate to return it, squeezing her tight. “You could never disappoint me.”</p>
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